It was such a memorable and fun learning experience! Di ko aakalain na enjoy talaga kasi medyo tinatamad akong sumama before. :P
Day 1:
4:45 na nagising! We left our house at 5:30 kaya before 6 nasa city hall na kami. excited? haha! 7 am pa yung registration but since filipino time, mage-8 am na nag-start. Nagdatingan na yung mga tao. Kakapal ng mukha namin, nasa stage kasi yung mga gamit namin, pati kami andun, sobrang ingay na nagtitinginan na yung mga tao. haha then some orientation and intros sa labas ng AV room with new group.
Inside, that is. I don't have to wear dark clothes or black eyeliner or fix my bangs (it's magulo the way it is). Kidding aside, I must admit that it's not even noticeable. But really, try to read between the lines of the quotes I now send and these poems that I recently made.
NO TEARS DROPPED IN THE MAKING OF THIS POEM. :)
Endless Sorrow
The moment I close my eyes and I fell into a deep sleep
I experience fulfillment of desires I used to keep
Seeing the face of a person who makes me weak
The moment you appear; abruptly my heart skips a beat
I thought I’d never see you again, but I was wrong
There you are, all smilingly, you wish that I still belong
Apparently, I grinned back, but it wasn’t for too long
‘Cuz I realized you aren’t worth any song
I hope you still remember my tears that seemed endless
I offered them all to you, but you just couldn’t care less
And you know you’re my one and only weakness
So tonight, suddenly, I want to be sleepless
I can’t stand to think of you, let alone see you
‘Cuz sadly, I still recall memories of a bad fall
Secretly, I’ve been wishing you’d just stab me at my back
Than to remind me of how you used to be my all
I live in the now, and you live in my past
All of my tears are dried at last
I want to move on, look forward to tomorrow
So please leave now, put a stop in my endless sorrow
I am open for comments and criticism :D I'll post the others in my next entry :)
Caveat: The one you're about to read is not really a poem. 'Cause it doesn't look like a poem. hehe it's just verses written freely. And don't take it too literally, esp. at the end. This "piece" is just a combination of all my rants.
I feel sad; I’m in a melancholy mood
It’s all because of you
When you don’t affirm
You make me feel unloved
When you show indifference
I suddenly feel all the sensitivity in the world
It’s as if I don’t matter to you, or even to anyone else
But then, there are also instances
When you made me feel important and loved
Even if I know those are just flatters,
And it’s hard to know your sincerity
Still I can’t help to feel good
So the stupid side of me believed you all the while
But I’m begging you to stop
‘Cause you’re making me even more confused
You really have to tell me the truth now
Like what and how do you consider me?
‘Cause I feel like I’m taking drug in overdose
That you are starting to become my addiction
So that I know I have to stop… Or else I might die :(
Maaaaaaaan. I was super badtrip the whole day. It started when the LA synthesis was postponed, but that was supposed to be my only class. Then we have to attend daw 1-4 pm on Monday. Ayaw nga namin! Haha. Then I hung out with my friends muna, and ate ice cream after. When I was about to go home, I saw him outside the convenience store with a girl. But that’s not really the issue. Nabadtrip ako ‘cuz I looked at him for a few seconds, waited for his response but he looked away and never looked back. GRR!!! And what about yesterday? Yesterday morning was the first time we ‘met’, supposedly. Actually we just bumped into each other (Andeng and I walked together to proceed to our next class in the B building). I really hoped that he will not notice me ‘cuz he and his friends were talking, but surprisingly, he looked up and saw me. So I half- smiled. He smiled back. Nakakatuwa ‘cuz the last night lang, we were talking if we ever see each other at school. Of course, I lied, instead of saying “Yes, if only you know, dati pa kita nakikita!” I said, “Baka.. kasi madami na kong nakikita ngayong guys sa Scho na hindi ko kakilala, and malamang isa ka na sa mga yun”. LOL and he agreed :P And I think what caused him to say that is we actually saw each other at cybernook that day (Thursday, we were making our thesis and he was using the computer unit behind ours). Maybe my face was familiar. Hehe then yun nga, he started to call me by my second name (which is joyce) :D And he made me another fs comment!!
Anyway.. fast forward to the ne-yo concert. It was great, but bitin. I think he sang less than 10 songs and it lasted for more than 1 hour lang! nako. Kinda nakakapanghinayang, but still okay. What’s not okay is that badshot ako ngayon sa family. Kasi after the concert last night, nagpahatid kami sa magallanes kina karissa (dunno which part yun basta!) Then we walked for a while and found a jeep. Sabi nung barker sa jeep buendia daw yun, eh di I was relieved kahit medyo gabi na yun. We started to become nervous when paubos na yung tao sa jeep, and kami yung kahuli-hulihang bumaba. As in, nasa prc na ata kami o pasong tamo, which is far from buendia. GRR!!! So nag-taxi na lang kami papuntang taft. Ayun, buti naman we arrived safely-though it’s already past 12am! Grabe. But my worst mistake was I lied to my mom, that I arrived at past 11pm, and I just fell asleep so I wasn’t able to text. But nahuli ako, and I was checked! Ayun, medyo galit na galit sila sakin and I don’t know how to respond, ‘cause it’s all my fault din naman. I couldn’t say that I did that to not make them worry, but I know it’ll just backfire. I really made them worry. And now, tampo kuya ko sakin L Haaaaay. Thank God Friday’s over, but dala ko pa din yung feelings up to now lalo nga yung incident sa school kanina. Oh well. We all have our days. Yun nga lang, I consider myself of having a bipolar disorder. After all that ‘saya’ and ‘kilig’, comes badtripness and loneliness next. *sigh*
It has become a habit na to talk about him in every end of my entry. And what I would like to say now is he’s making me more confused. Ang gulo niya, sobra. One time he’s sweet, concerned and funny(through text lang syempre), on the other time he’s cold and hindi namamansin and insensitive. Hayy I really don’t know what to do! I started to give up on him, but eto na naman siya. I can’t help it talaga. Kung pwede lang na sabihin ko sa kanyang tigilan na niya ang panggugulo sa buhay ko (which I think, he doesn’t intend to do).
Btw, I saw the guy in the sponge cola vid “movie” yesterday outside Araneta. Nagulat nga ako so napatingin ako sa kanya. Napatingin din siya and I looked away. Grabe! I have a ‘feeling’ for him pa naman. And he looks like crushcrushcrush kaya ganun na lang ako napa-react! Such coincidences. *sigh again*
It was such a memorable and fun learning experience! Di ko aakalain na enjoy talaga kasi medyo tinatamad akong sumama before. :P
Day 1:
4:45 na nagising! We left our house at 5:30 kaya before 6 nasa city hall na kami. excited? haha! 7 am pa yung registration but since filipino time, mage-8 am na nag-start. Nagdatingan na yung mga tao. Kakapal ng mukha namin, nasa stage kasi yung mga gamit namin, pati kami andun, sobrang ingay na nagtitinginan na yung mga tao. haha then some orientation and intros sa labas ng AV room with new group.
Inside, that is. I don't have to wear dark clothes or black eyeliner or fix my bangs (it's magulo the way it is). Kidding aside, I must admit that it's not even noticeable. But really, try to read between the lines of the quotes I now send and these poems that I recently made.
NO TEARS DROPPED IN THE MAKING OF THIS POEM. :)
Endless Sorrow
The moment I close my eyes and I fell into a deep sleep
I experience fulfillment of desires I used to keep
Seeing the face of a person who makes me weak
The moment you appear; abruptly my heart skips a beat
I thought I’d never see you again, but I was wrong
There you are, all smilingly, you wish that I still belong
Apparently, I grinned back, but it wasn’t for too long
‘Cuz I realized you aren’t worth any song
I hope you still remember my tears that seemed endless
I offered them all to you, but you just couldn’t care less
And you know you’re my one and only weakness
So tonight, suddenly, I want to be sleepless
I can’t stand to think of you, let alone see you
‘Cuz sadly, I still recall memories of a bad fall
Secretly, I’ve been wishing you’d just stab me at my back
Than to remind me of how you used to be my all
I live in the now, and you live in my past
All of my tears are dried at last
I want to move on, look forward to tomorrow
So please leave now, put a stop in my endless sorrow
I am open for comments and criticism :D I'll post the others in my next entry :)
Caveat: The one you're about to read is not really a poem. 'Cause it doesn't look like a poem. hehe it's just verses written freely. And don't take it too literally, esp. at the end. This "piece" is just a combination of all my rants.
I feel sad; I’m in a melancholy mood
It’s all because of you
When you don’t affirm
You make me feel unloved
When you show indifference
I suddenly feel all the sensitivity in the world
It’s as if I don’t matter to you, or even to anyone else
But then, there are also instances
When you made me feel important and loved
Even if I know those are just flatters,
And it’s hard to know your sincerity
Still I can’t help to feel good
So the stupid side of me believed you all the while
But I’m begging you to stop
‘Cause you’re making me even more confused
You really have to tell me the truth now
Like what and how do you consider me?
‘Cause I feel like I’m taking drug in overdose
That you are starting to become my addiction
So that I know I have to stop… Or else I might die :(
Maaaaaaaan. I was super badtrip the whole day. It started when the LA synthesis was postponed, but that was supposed to be my only class. Then we have to attend daw 1-4 pm on Monday. Ayaw nga namin! Haha. Then I hung out with my friends muna, and ate ice cream after. When I was about to go home, I saw him outside the convenience store with a girl. But that’s not really the issue. Nabadtrip ako ‘cuz I looked at him for a few seconds, waited for his response but he looked away and never looked back. GRR!!! And what about yesterday? Yesterday morning was the first time we ‘met’, supposedly. Actually we just bumped into each other (Andeng and I walked together to proceed to our next class in the B building). I really hoped that he will not notice me ‘cuz he and his friends were talking, but surprisingly, he looked up and saw me. So I half- smiled. He smiled back. Nakakatuwa ‘cuz the last night lang, we were talking if we ever see each other at school. Of course, I lied, instead of saying “Yes, if only you know, dati pa kita nakikita!” I said, “Baka.. kasi madami na kong nakikita ngayong guys sa Scho na hindi ko kakilala, and malamang isa ka na sa mga yun”. LOL and he agreed :P And I think what caused him to say that is we actually saw each other at cybernook that day (Thursday, we were making our thesis and he was using the computer unit behind ours). Maybe my face was familiar. Hehe then yun nga, he started to call me by my second name (which is joyce) :D And he made me another fs comment!!
Anyway.. fast forward to the ne-yo concert. It was great, but bitin. I think he sang less than 10 songs and it lasted for more than 1 hour lang! nako. Kinda nakakapanghinayang, but still okay. What’s not okay is that badshot ako ngayon sa family. Kasi after the concert last night, nagpahatid kami sa magallanes kina karissa (dunno which part yun basta!) Then we walked for a while and found a jeep. Sabi nung barker sa jeep buendia daw yun, eh di I was relieved kahit medyo gabi na yun. We started to become nervous when paubos na yung tao sa jeep, and kami yung kahuli-hulihang bumaba. As in, nasa prc na ata kami o pasong tamo, which is far from buendia. GRR!!! So nag-taxi na lang kami papuntang taft. Ayun, buti naman we arrived safely-though it’s already past 12am! Grabe. But my worst mistake was I lied to my mom, that I arrived at past 11pm, and I just fell asleep so I wasn’t able to text. But nahuli ako, and I was checked! Ayun, medyo galit na galit sila sakin and I don’t know how to respond, ‘cause it’s all my fault din naman. I couldn’t say that I did that to not make them worry, but I know it’ll just backfire. I really made them worry. And now, tampo kuya ko sakin L Haaaaay. Thank God Friday’s over, but dala ko pa din yung feelings up to now lalo nga yung incident sa school kanina. Oh well. We all have our days. Yun nga lang, I consider myself of having a bipolar disorder. After all that ‘saya’ and ‘kilig’, comes badtripness and loneliness next. *sigh*
It has become a habit na to talk about him in every end of my entry. And what I would like to say now is he’s making me more confused. Ang gulo niya, sobra. One time he’s sweet, concerned and funny(through text lang syempre), on the other time he’s cold and hindi namamansin and insensitive. Hayy I really don’t know what to do! I started to give up on him, but eto na naman siya. I can’t help it talaga. Kung pwede lang na sabihin ko sa kanyang tigilan na niya ang panggugulo sa buhay ko (which I think, he doesn’t intend to do).
Btw, I saw the guy in the sponge cola vid “movie” yesterday outside Araneta. Nagulat nga ako so napatingin ako sa kanya. Napatingin din siya and I looked away. Grabe! I have a ‘feeling’ for him pa naman. And he looks like crushcrushcrush kaya ganun na lang ako napa-react! Such coincidences. *sigh again*